This Time

June 10, 2013
Prompt: 10 minutes: “this time”

This Time
This time I am braver. I haven’t even sent out an email yet, put it on Facebook, keeping the cancer private, more or less, for the past week. This time it feels so much more manageable — almost routine. I mean I know it’s surgery and I don’t like pain or recovery exercises, but this time I don’t have a fear of death — I truly believe it’s just a little left over from five years ago, a remnant. But we’re going to get it good this time, and hopefully I won’t have to deal with this again for a long time, if ever.

This time I’m taking it in stride. Getting my ducks in a row, practically speaking, but the emotional component either hasn’t hit me yet, or it’s really just not a big deal the second time around. I guess if the docs were more worried, maybe I would be, but …

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3 thoughts on “This Time

  1. I hated hitting the “like” button, because I really don’t like this news. I’m sending hugs too, but most importantly, I’m sending fairies from the four corners of the earth to stand by your side. Sometimes their aim is off and they fly into your eyes and cause lots of tears to flow, but they don’t mean to. They also cause smiles out of nowhere, some hold hope on their shoulders and parade it all around you. You’ll like them. Promise.
    Patti

    Like

  2. Good luck – recurrences of cancer can rock the boat quite a bit so it is wonderful to see you model such calm. I was not so calm with mine but then again, I started out as stage iv so a recurrence had a different weight and mine happened within the first year. Stay balanced
    warmly,
    Marcy Westerling
    http://livinglydying.com/

    Like

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