Behind but Thankful

Ok, so I’m already behind on the NaBloPoMo – who was I kidding thinking I might do the NaNoWriMo?! I still WANT to do both! But now isn’t this just so telling of my personality?! Life to me is like going to Golden Coral – I tend to fill my plate with much more than I can ever consume. Next time, I do the same all over again.

I am so grateful that I still WANT to do things, even though my body sometimes (ok, often, but I’m an optimist) doesn’t cooperate. Dr. Lapp asks me that question when we have our every six month follow-ups for the chronic fatigue syndrome and fibromyalgia that has plagued me for … it will be 24 years on November 25. “Do you still have interest in things?” At least 85% of the time now I can answer that question in the affirmative. Thank God. The other dark, lonely, flat place is no fun at all. Still, in hindsight when I am feeling better, I am grateful for the low days, too. They are part of the contrast, which makes me appreciate so many little simple things at this stage of my life. Today I am grateful that I WANT to do so many things, including writing. I may fall short of my goals, but I am alive, awake, aspiring for more.

I know I must get on with my day, yet my heart is so FULL of gratitude, so I really only have time to make a list:

* I am grateful for my loving husband, with whom I can be myself, graying hair, pooching belly and all. He adores me and we both agree there is no one we would rather be driven crazy by than each other! I respect him, his values, his strength, his even-tempered personality, and especially the way he walks the dog each night, helps in the kitchen more and more, and does all those fine motor kinds of things that elude me – like the efficient and gentle way he got two splinters out of the palm of my right hand yesterday. He’s the best and deserves his own LONG post! But that will have to wait…

* I am grateful for my beautiful home with its newly remodeled kitchen, the gorgeous yard my husband tends with its now red and yellow and falling leaves; the purple, blue, white and yellow pansies he planted for me in containers on the back porch; the cozy, way it feels when I return to it. Last night, after ten days at the beach, I unlocked the back door, juggling bags and my purse and the keys and all and I walked in, trying not to get bruised again by the heavy storm door. I turned on the lights – the new funky pendant lights – and I couldn’t help but smile. It smelled like home. You know that smell. Every home has its own. But this one was ours, and it felt like putting on my favorite faded, stained sweater on a chilly day.

And now the timer has dinged and there is no time to even finish my list. Shocking for me, I know. I must get in the shower so I won’t be late to appointments. I am grateful for the nice hot shower I am about to have. Many people in this world do not have that luxury you know.

NaBloPoMo Challenge

Having just cancelled my registration to my favorite writing workshop yesterday due to health challenges, I have decided to take on NaNoWriMo and, while I’m at it, NaBloPoMo,the blogging version of this November activity. I mean, with Thanksgiving and Christmas upcoming, my kitchen renovation coming to an end (meaning I am still quite disorganized and cannot locate certain important papers and routinely needed items), why not add another daily “to do” to my evergrowing list?! After all, that’s how I roll.

Really, I figure participating in this annual event will elevate my writing to a priority status, which I can also do from the comfort of my own bed, I mean, home (smile). As much as I love the process when I get going, somehow writing usually gets shifted to the back burner as I pay bills, wash clothes, take phone calls, schedule and attend medical appointments, walk the dog, shop at Whole Foods and, when I’m in the vicinity, Trader Joe’s, pack and unpack from trips to our little beach house, and thumb through the piles and bags of papers that seem to accumulate and reproduce of their own accord while all this other is going on. What IS it about this day and time that consumes so much of us, as we consume the technology and tools that are supposed to make us so efficient?

Hmmm… that’s enough to explore throughout November blog posts alone.

Stay tuned, however, for more creative posts. Now, I’m going to take advantage of the sun peaking through the clouds and take the dog for a walk on the beach. NaNoWriMo will have to wait. Again.
NaBloPoMo November 2013